1. I've developed a analog->digital path for my kids. Before they can get a music player, they get a CD player. Before they get video games, they get board games. And then, for video games, before they get Super Mario Odyssey they get the original Super Mario Bros. Each of these "first they get" is a long period. Years long. Give them something that has limitations so they can truly explore it. Find the nooks and crannies of something. Make up their own weird little things within that limitation. And then, back to music, I want my kids to know what a musical album is, know how to savor the highs and the lows, how sometimes certain tracks mean more to you based on your mood or life-stage, then just an endless playlist of newness.

2. The gorilla in the room is that most adults can barely handle online media.

3. The other gorilla in the room is porn. Again, see #2.

4. The classic philosophers placed Prudence as the queen of virtues. What is prudence? It is essentially the ability to grasp reality. Why did they say that was most important? Because you couldn't use any of the other virtues if your didn't have a good grasp of reality (e.g. fortitude would be foolhardiness if you ran into a ill-conceived death thinking you were being brave).

You need to make sure you and your kids are able to grasp reality, not just the appearance of it.

I hate how many people now, whenever we're around them everyone has their phones out scrolling through 30 sec videos. They want to show you things which aren't funny, aren't entertaining, aren't informative... it's damn near Idiocracy levels of content consumption.

[Insert video of someone badly dancing with caption that says "me."]

Personally, I find it bizarre and extremely boring.

The rule in the house is; 1) no social media accounts until 13 and 2) one of your parents will be your 'friend' on that account.

This is actually a pretty great expression of "kids keep you young."

But, right now is right now and how kids communicate with each other is constantly changing - social media or not.

So, if you're not a parent to a tween or teens now - I'd say you have little to actually worry about as the landscape will be completely different in a decade.

We did no smartphones before high school. (Have had zero problems with that in terms of their social acceptance) Also, no computers in their rooms - everything is done in more shared space, with monitors facing the rest of the room. We talk about what kinds of content to watch out for, how to think critically about it, and what kinds of content or people are more serious, that they need to let us know if they run into. (Stalkers, scammers, other such actively harmful stuff.)

That does give them enough freedom once they hit high school to be more secretive about what they do. But we feel that is also more appropriate as they grow older. There have been problems. When they occur, we talk openly about them and help them both resolve the problems and learn from them. We are big believers that wisdom comes from experience, and experience comes from doing, so we try to focus on letting them expand their autonomy as they grow up, while at the same time minimizing harm when mistakes are made and learning from them.

He's never used a screen in any significant way. No movies / TV / cellphones / iPads.

My spouse and I read to him a lot. A chapter or two a night from one of the Oz books (there are dozens of them, we're on the 8th one) or something similar.

Results so far? He has a very wide vocabulary, loves learning about the world around him and has almost zero interest in screens.

I hope that by the time he reaches social media age (whatever that is) that the fad has passed and people move on to something less toxic. Even if not, we'll make sure he's in lots of social groups and camps where the focus is doing things rather than spending time on a device.